Aussie Politics

15 Jul

I got told by an overseas friend, when the political shit storm was going down here the other week, that “I don’t understand your politics.”

I have news for people – I live here and I don’t bloody understand them.

We have a party political system as just about every other democracy does.  Ours, however, is scattered with independents who refuse to toe any party political line, screaming nutters no party wants, and egotists who create their own parties out of nothing.

I know our leadership confuses the Americans.  It simply means the country’s leader is the person in control of the party that has the majority.  This doesn’t always work out well because at the moment the “controlling” party is only got it’s arse in control because a group of independents is holding it upright.  The moment one of the independents gets pissed, the whole edifice will come down like a house of cards.

And the leader is voted on by the party, not the people.  Which explains why Julia Gillard managed to snare the top job.  She knifed the former incumbent, Kevin Rudd, in the back, then, in a nice little twist that the writers of “West Wing” would have loved, he decorated her shoulder blades with knife hilts and took the job back.

Most Aussies couldn’t give a rat’s arse for politics, which is probably why we have compulsory democracy.  Yup, you heard me.  COMPULSORY.  We have to bloody well vote, otherwise we cop fines.  This is the sort of “democracy” you usually only see in small African dictatorships.  At least we aren’t told how to vote – yet!

We have two houses – The House of Representatives and the Senate.  Voting for the Senate this year is going to be a barrel of laughs, as apparently the voting paper will end up being about 2 metres long, due to the volume of candidates, many of whom are independents or represent small fruit cake parties.  I think I’ll just vote for the Sex Party and be done with it.  They can’t be any worse than the Greens, who cannot see the irony of wanting people to vote for them when they would prefer to hug trees and wombats than care for people.

This brings to the last piece of political confusion.  Voting.  We have preferential voting,  You vote for your chosen candidates in order and the votes cascade down your preferences if your first choice doesn’t get enough votes.  This happens regularly.  You can chose the order or just select one candidate with the instructions that your vote be dispersed as per his arrangements, which are usually Machiavellian arrangements with even less liked candidates and involve sacrificing a black cock at midnight!  Okay, I’m exaggerating, but you get the idea.  

With a 2 metre long voting paper for the Senate I am DEFINITELY voting for the Sex Party and letting the votes fall where they will. 


7 Responses to “Aussie Politics”

  1. cartoonmick July 15, 2013 at 10:43 pm #

    Between now and the election, we must all try and stay sane and sober throughout the onslaught we’re about to receive.

    And if anyone is looking for relief from all the political spin and feels the urge to follow the Sex Party, then I say “go for it”.

    But something we should all consider on our way to the election is, “on the international stage, do you want Abbott or Rudd speaking on Australia’s behalf ??”

    Which one projects the best “statesman” like image ?

    Which one is the most “professional”?

    And as you prepare to fill out your ballot slip, just think, “Would I buy a used car from this man/woman?”




    • margysmusings July 15, 2013 at 10:59 pm #

      Let’s be honest, the word “statesman” cannot be applied to any one of our politicians. I think the last genuine statesman that Australia had was Bob Menzies! This bunch of clowns, buffoons, and time servers don’t even come close.

      Thanks for your feedback, I really appreciate it.


  2. Milagros jorge July 16, 2013 at 12:47 am #

    OMG! And I thought PR political situation was complicated, LOL!!!!…need to read aboyt Australian Goverment a little bit 🙂


    • margysmusings July 16, 2013 at 1:05 am #

      You’ll need a stiff drink when you do. 🙂


      • Milagros jorge July 17, 2013 at 1:29 am #

        ROFL!!! Noted!!!!!


  3. Bellz July 16, 2013 at 3:38 am #

    Don’t waste your vote Margy. As Mick said, you need to choose one or the other. I know who I am voting for now.


    • margysmusings July 16, 2013 at 3:40 am #

      Actually, I don’t need to chose any. I object to be told I must vote, so I’ll vote as I damn well please. I consider it a conscious vote. Both major parties can go stuff themselves, and the Greens can join them.


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